well. that happened.
Today it has been two years since I was diagnosed with Complex Regional Pain Syndrome.
This morning, both my feet were the same happy and healthy color, size, and temperature. Occasionally the left foot feels hot and itchy. I ignore the heat and itch, and they go away pretty quickly. There’s not much that I would call pain anymore.
This trick often works for me with other pain too. Like: I feel my lower back start to get fussy, and I roll my eyes and get on with my day. Pretty soon I’ve forgotten all about it.
I want to say something about how I tried to ignore the pain in my belly this winter, how I believed I was only feeling it because I was boiling mad at someone I used to consider a friend, but it didn’t go away because it was actually appendicitis. My appendix ruptured, and I ended up in the hospital for four days. I had two surgeries in four months. I’m just about recovered from the second one.
I want to say something wise about pain and fear, or about finding balance, or about learning to trust oneself. But I’m fresh out of wisdom.
The only thing that’s coming to mind is something my mentor once said to me: “I feel like this is a place where we can sit and say, ‘Well. That happened.'”
